There’s the old adage about men and the mid-life crisis: sometime in their 40s they look around, realize mortality is real and upon them, and they respond in kind.
I appreciate your sentiments here. As an adherent of Stoicism, all I can say is that, in my humble opinion, "arete" is the why. Because of all the externals you discuss that are beyond our control, all we can really latch onto for greater meaning in our lives, the only thing that makes life worth living (because all else, including family, can be taken from us, despite all our best efforts), is the pursuit of virtue. That will not guarantee us any rewards in the material sense, but if done rightly should help you find the equanimity you're looking for. I struggle with many of the same disappointments and frustrations, the lonesomeness and exasperation with the world. I hope neither of us give in to cynicism.
1) the HATM community (and I’m not even that active. I appreciate that it’s there). This thing came from you and that says something.
2) I believe in your ability to create connections in the position you hold because you believe in the purpose. Others might “work there “ but you believe in developing connection.
I think much of what you’re saying also comes from expectations. In my line of work, people’s stories lead them to places they never expected, mine included. When reality doesn’t meet expectations, we have a choice regarding how to respond. I look at the past and recognize I have known love and experienced beauty. I have given and received. And, I’m healthy enough to continue on. I feel better right now knowing I can still help others. When that becomes impossible (we are all pre-disabled) I’ll try to continue to be kind to my caretakers and find pleasure where I can. It may just come down to cats in the end.
I appreciate your sentiments here. As an adherent of Stoicism, all I can say is that, in my humble opinion, "arete" is the why. Because of all the externals you discuss that are beyond our control, all we can really latch onto for greater meaning in our lives, the only thing that makes life worth living (because all else, including family, can be taken from us, despite all our best efforts), is the pursuit of virtue. That will not guarantee us any rewards in the material sense, but if done rightly should help you find the equanimity you're looking for. I struggle with many of the same disappointments and frustrations, the lonesomeness and exasperation with the world. I hope neither of us give in to cynicism.
Reasons I am grateful for Jason Herbert:
1) the HATM community (and I’m not even that active. I appreciate that it’s there). This thing came from you and that says something.
2) I believe in your ability to create connections in the position you hold because you believe in the purpose. Others might “work there “ but you believe in developing connection.
I think much of what you’re saying also comes from expectations. In my line of work, people’s stories lead them to places they never expected, mine included. When reality doesn’t meet expectations, we have a choice regarding how to respond. I look at the past and recognize I have known love and experienced beauty. I have given and received. And, I’m healthy enough to continue on. I feel better right now knowing I can still help others. When that becomes impossible (we are all pre-disabled) I’ll try to continue to be kind to my caretakers and find pleasure where I can. It may just come down to cats in the end.